{"id":169,"date":"2013-09-16T14:18:41","date_gmt":"2013-09-16T14:18:41","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/iamsignificant.ca\/andre\/?p=169"},"modified":"2016-10-28T17:08:05","modified_gmt":"2016-10-28T17:08:05","slug":"a-gift-from-my-4-year-old-parenting","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/iamsignificant.ca\/andre\/sole-significance\/a-gift-from-my-4-year-old-parenting\/","title":{"rendered":"A Gift from my 4 year old – Parenting"},"content":{"rendered":"

One of the great things in my life is parenting\u00a0my children. \u00a0There have been seasons in my life though where I had missed the reality of that in my life. \u00a0It wasn\u2019t that my guys were hellions, for I can\u2019t remember a day when I wished I had never had them, but there were <\/span>sadly, plenty of times I lost track of the gift that my three sons are.<\/span><\/p>\n

I get to spend the majority of my days with my now <\/span>four-year-old son. \u00a0 I have a number of friends and colleagues give the patronizing \u201cOh <\/span>yah.... how\u2019s that going?\u201d \u00a0To which I am quick to reply \u201cParenting has\u00a0been awesome!\u201d and it truly has been because for the first time in 18 plus years of parenting I am experiencing the gift that only a <\/span>four-year-old can give - the gift to slow down.<\/span><\/p>\n

Huh? \u00a0Slow down? With a <\/span>four-year-old? \u00a0That\u2019s exactly what I mean. \u00a0While he was a busy and active fellow and he doesn\u2019t do the things I need him to do quickly nor efficiently, He offers me this as a precious gift. \u00a0 For example, before, if I had an appointment I would calculate my travel time and work right up to the last possible moment before I ran out of my office, to my car and off to my meeting. \u00a0With my son, the preparation to leave takes about a half an hour.<\/span><\/p>\n

Understand, it\u2019s not rocket science parenting to get out the door but the simple task of getting our shoes and coat on was always delayed with \u201cI need to go potty\u201d or-and-sometimes \u201cI don\u2019t like these socks.\" Then there was \u201cDad, where do the clouds come from?\u201d and \u201cOh look, a cat!\u201d \u00a0 None of these things are bad or inappropriate for my four <\/span>year old, but when combined with \u2018we gotta get out the door for pre-kindergarten that starts in ten minutes, we have all the elements of a perfect storm!<\/span><\/p>\n

In the not too distant past, this would increase my already <\/span>high-stress level, and I would have become frustrated. \u00a0 He goes at a very fast pace - just doing things that do not always compliment my objectives. \u00a0This is where my stress in parenting comes in. My son isn\u2019t doing anything wrong; he is simply being four!<\/span><\/p>\n

As I was reflecting on this common situation, I came to realize the precious gift of my <\/span>four-year-old son - he is teaching me a healthier rhythm to life - to slow down a bit and keep things in perspective.<\/span><\/p>\n

He\u2019s four, and he is naturally going to be slower. \u00a0He is not bad, inconsiderate, irresponsible. He is four.<\/span><\/p>\n

I realize and accept this is the way it is and adjust accordingly - if it takes a half hour to get out the door, we start a half hour earlier.<\/span><\/p>\n

If we are late, generally it\u2019s really no big deal. \u00a0I am not suggesting chronic tardiness is a good thing but is it really worth getting frustrated and losing our tempers for being two minutes late for pre-K? \u00a0 Nope!<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

As North Americans, I think we measure life by productivity, how much we accomplish, what we have produced, and this has some merit but also comes with some major side effects. \u00a0In our effort to provide for our families and provide our kids with great opportunities to participate in sports, have the latest gaming system or whatever; we lose sight that in all our striving to acquire it, we overlook the cost of this driven lifestyle. \u00a0In a very real way, our frantic pace diminishes what really matters in our children's lives - us.<\/span><\/p>\n

How many times have we raced like mad to get our kids to sports, dance, school events, etc., all because we love them, want them to have fun and be healthy?\u00a0But in the franticness of it all, if we hurt each other - \u201cI am taking you to hockey because I love you, damn it! \u00a0Now shut up and do what I say.<\/strong> \u00a0Do it NOW!\u201d \u00a0Sigh. \u00a0I am learning the hows of what we do are as important as the end goal.<\/span><\/p>\n

My <\/span>four-year-old<\/strong> is messing up that insanity that is my busy life<\/strong>, and you know what? \u00a0I have discovered the world doesn\u2019t come to an end<\/strong>. \u00a0 The things which need to get done, in fact, get done, and those things that don\u2019t will be there when I have time. \u00a0 I have discovered that some of the things I thought were so important just aren\u2019t and are certainly not worth losing my temper with my son just because he will not perform to the manic pace of my life. \u00a0 \u00a0So in a sense, the having to do things with my son is like an oasis in my day. \u00a0A welcomed oasis - a different rhythm in another wise crazy day. \u00a0This is a gift - to slow down, accept his rhythm instead of trying to force him into mine.<\/span><\/p>\n

Accept it. \u00a0Plan for it and then relax in it.<\/span><\/strong><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"One of the great things in my life is parenting\u00a0my children. \u00a0There have been seasons in my life though where I had missed the reality of that in my life. \u00a0It wasn\u2019t that my guys were hellions, for I can\u2019t remember a day when I wished I had never had them, but there were sadly, plenty of times I lost Continue Reading<\/a>","protected":false},"author":4,"featured_media":11588,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[33,34],"tags":[95,248,383,442,475,534],"yoast_head":"\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\t\n\t\n\n\n\n\n\t\n\t\n\t\n