{"id":15012,"date":"2019-12-06T08:18:23","date_gmt":"2019-12-06T08:18:23","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/iamsignificant.ca\/?p=15012"},"modified":"2019-12-04T18:22:35","modified_gmt":"2019-12-04T18:22:35","slug":"walking-in-the-dark","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/iamsignificant.ca\/home\/featured\/walking-in-the-dark\/","title":{"rendered":"Walking in the Dark"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><span style=\"font-family: helvetica, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12pt;\">The above quote stirred me deeply today. \u201cDo not be afraid\u201d is a constant mantra through the scripture (some 70+ times) &#8230; and from personal experience, I can understand why.<span class=\"Apple-converted-space\">\u00a0<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-family: helvetica, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12pt;\">I continue in a season of a long dark shadow.<span class=\"Apple-converted-space\">\u00a0 <\/span>A dark shadow cast by my beloved\u2019s journey with Cancer. <span class=\"Apple-converted-space\">\u00a0 <\/span>These past 6 months have been the longest decade of my life.<span class=\"Apple-converted-space\">\u00a0 <\/span>This journey continues to bust all the seeming necessary lies I have believed, the pie-in-the-sky theology and all its pithy cliches.<span class=\"Apple-converted-space\">\u00a0\u00a0<\/span>We all know in the core of who we are that shit happens.<span class=\"Apple-converted-space\">\u00a0 <\/span>It\u2019s no one&#8217;s fault, certainly not Gods.<span class=\"Apple-converted-space\">\u00a0 The problem<\/span>\u00a0is many don\u2019t live from the core of who we are.<span class=\"Apple-converted-space\">\u00a0 <\/span>For this is indeed the wild frontier &#8211; the undiscovered country.<span class=\"Apple-converted-space\">\u00a0<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-family: helvetica, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12pt;\">I think the fear of death in its multiplicity of forms is the essence of the beasties that guard the gates to that inner place, our core.<span class=\"Apple-converted-space\">\u00a0 <\/span>That place of Union with God and our true self.<span class=\"Apple-converted-space\">\u00a0 <span style=\"font-family: helvetica, arial, sans-serif;\">For me and for many the space of where we live a lot of the time and where we <em>want<\/em> to live from is where the wild beasts haunt.\u00a0 Beasts of uncertainty, anxiety, the dreaded <em>what-ifs<\/em> along with their henchmen:\u00a0<em>should\u2019ve<\/em>, <em>could\u2019ve<\/em> and <em>only-if<\/em><\/span>.\u00a0<\/span>The source of sulfurous anxiety-induced sweats, the wrenching of our guts into knots, the roars and taunts of lies serve well to turn us back &#8211; to live shallowly, fearfully and reluctant to truly live into our gifting, our values, and our faith.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-family: helvetica, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12pt;\">Perfect love drives out fear, and this is why becoming love is such a necessary journey.<span class=\"Apple-converted-space\">\u00a0 <\/span>I believe it.<span class=\"Apple-converted-space\">\u00a0\u00a0<\/span>I have experienced it, but like summitting any great inner mountain, each new elevation comes with its own old perils &#8211; presenting as seemingly new.<span class=\"Apple-converted-space\">\u00a0 <\/span>The truth is, the way through these challenges is the same as the ones before &#8211; love inspired courage and the awareness that we are not alone.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-family: helvetica, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12pt;\">I get it, I guess on some level.<span class=\"Apple-converted-space\">\u00a0 <\/span>Yet, I suppose the truth is I\u2019m am unsteady in the face of my beloved with Cancer (and this serves a petri dish for a whole host of other uncertainties).<span class=\"Apple-converted-space\">\u00a0 <\/span>The phantasms and what-ifs sometimes rattle my cage, most often in the dead of night.<span class=\"Apple-converted-space\">\u00a0 <\/span>The cliche\u2019s and bravado of my younger faith are no longer comforting or helpful.<span class=\"Apple-converted-space\">\u00a0 <\/span>The necessary lies that once provided comfort are exposed as flaccid and paraded in disgrace through the neural pathways of my mind.<\/span><\/p>\n<blockquote><p><span style=\"font-size: 12pt; font-family: helvetica, arial, sans-serif;\"><strong>God is a God of the present. God is always in the moment, be that moment hard or easy, joyful or painful. &#8211; Henri Nouwen<\/strong><\/span><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p><span style=\"font-family: helvetica, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12pt;\">My refuge is to descend from my head to my heart. Past the terrors of what-ifs, the threats, lying hisses through into the secret place.The place where God and I live as one. The confluence. It is the place of presence and co-suffering love.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-family: helvetica, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12pt;\">Scripture encourages us that there is really nothing to be afraid of because of the way Jesus holds us (Ro.8). Jesus holds us all in such a way that that no created thing will be able to separate us from the love of God. I am comforted with this tenacious hope, that the light of love is the assurance of that we\u2019re never alone. A light that burns in the darkness, a guiding light that declares that death(s) doesn\u2019t have the final word. But because of Love there is a rugged overcoming life.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-family: helvetica, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12pt;\">But to be honest, some days in feels like I am alone, that the light is damned illusive. Sometimes I need some help to reorient myself to the lingering light in the midst of a dark season. Most time my spiritual practices are helpful for reestablishing my bearing, but sometimes it requires the help of a faithful forgiving friend. These gifts, these practices, these relationships can help us see the light and get our bearing. \u00a0I suppose one can even say that as one walks this out, with each tentative step, we are learning to walk in the night-time of life or if you like, walking by faith not by sight.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-family: helvetica, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12pt;\">This is the push &#8211; pull in my heart.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-family: helvetica, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12pt;\">My holy work.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-family: helvetica, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12pt;\">My steadfast living prayer.<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"The above quote stirred me deeply today. \u201cDo not be afraid\u201d is a constant mantra through the scripture (some 70+ times) &#8230; and from personal experience, I can understand why.\u00a0 I continue in a season of a long dark shadow.\u00a0 A dark shadow cast by my beloved\u2019s journey with Cancer. \u00a0 These past 6 months&#8230;","protected":false},"author":4,"featured_media":15014,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[8,674],"tags":[175,260,700,554],"class_list":["post-15012","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-featured","category-grief-loss","tag-faith","tag-hope","tag-walk-by-faith","tag-wholeness-brokeness"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v27.6 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>Walking in the Dark - Michael Rose<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"I suppose one can even say that as one walks this out, with each tentative step, we are learning to walk in the night-time of life or if you like, walking by faith not by sight.\" \/>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/iamsignificant.ca\/home\/featured\/walking-in-the-dark\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Walking in the Dark - Michael Rose\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"I suppose one can even say that as one walks this out, with each tentative step, we are learning to walk in the night-time of life or if you like, walking by faith not by sight.\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/iamsignificant.ca\/home\/featured\/walking-in-the-dark\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Michael Rose\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:publisher\" content=\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/IamSignificant.ca\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2019-12-06T08:18:23+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"https:\/\/iamsignificant.ca\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/12\/5489DFB4-0494-4078-8A59-BC42FC7DEA6D-e1575405929895.jpeg\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:width\" content=\"600\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:height\" content=\"598\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:type\" content=\"image\/jpeg\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"Michael Rose\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:creator\" content=\"@Michaelmrose\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:site\" content=\"@MichaelMRose\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Written by\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"Michael Rose\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:label2\" content=\"Est. reading time\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data2\" content=\"4 minutes\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\\\/\\\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"Article\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/iamsignificant.ca\\\/home\\\/featured\\\/walking-in-the-dark\\\/#article\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/iamsignificant.ca\\\/home\\\/featured\\\/walking-in-the-dark\\\/\"},\"author\":{\"name\":\"Michael Rose\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/iamsignificant.ca\\\/home\\\/#\\\/schema\\\/person\\\/921abea4272ad2ecac0ac78170212af4\"},\"headline\":\"Walking in the Dark\",\"datePublished\":\"2019-12-06T08:18:23+00:00\",\"mainEntityOfPage\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/iamsignificant.ca\\\/home\\\/featured\\\/walking-in-the-dark\\\/\"},\"wordCount\":712,\"commentCount\":0,\"publisher\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/iamsignificant.ca\\\/home\\\/#organization\"},\"image\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/iamsignificant.ca\\\/home\\\/featured\\\/walking-in-the-dark\\\/#primaryimage\"},\"thumbnailUrl\":\"https:\\\/\\\/iamsignificant.ca\\\/wp-content\\\/uploads\\\/2019\\\/12\\\/5489DFB4-0494-4078-8A59-BC42FC7DEA6D-e1575405929895.jpeg\",\"keywords\":[\"faith\",\"hope\",\"walk by faith\",\"wholeness brokeness\"],\"articleSection\":[\"Featured\",\"Grief &amp; 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