What Forgiveness can mean to You

Forgiveness is more than just forgiving because we think "it is the right thing to do" but because in choosing to forgive those who have hurt us we are taking a step toward peace with ourselves and thus towards a deep profound sense of freedom.

Forgiveness doesn't mean we simply 'forget' what happened or that it is somehow all okay.  Rather forgiveness is a deliberate choice to forgive a debt, release the negative emotional hold on an individual or situation and walk forward into life, if even with a limp.

Perhaps there is a person or situation which has hurt you.  Maybe you can see how that hurt has become toxic in your life and may be affecting your relationships and perhaps your job performance.  Is it time for you to address those hurts?

Forgiveness

Is a choice. It is your right to be angry and while anger can be healthy for a short time in constructive ways, long term anger will poison you.  Are you going to hold onto your anger or deal with it and then let it go?

Is a process.  My personal experience suggests we often need to choose to forgive over and over again.  Sometimes when the bitterness arises we need to stop and remind ourselves of our choice to forgive.

Is about our Freedom not the affirmation of something wrong. Forgiveness does not mean what happened is somehow right or good.  To release the person or the situation prevents you from becoming a chronic victim; living not only with the pain or loss but the ravage of bitterness and unhealthy anger.

If you are struggling with unforgiveness and feel 'stuck in it' it may be a good idea to seek someone who can help you through the process.  Someone who is skilled to help you through the grieving process, deal with your emotions in healthy ways and support you towards greater wholeness.   It may be helpful working with a qualified psychologist, a trained grief counselor or experienced spiritual director.

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